Hot Child in the Crawford

Jump to Comments

Jenna Bush & Henry Hager Wedding Facts

from this CNN.com article.
cross-posted at MeanRachel.com

Bride: Jenna Welch Bush

Known by her friends as “Hot Toddy”

Groom: Henry Chase Hager

Known by his friends as “Sucker.”

Place: President Bush’s Prairie Chapel Ranch, Crawford, Texas

Where the Heaven’s Gate cult cut their teeth before they moved to Cali.

Guests: More than 200 friends and relatives

I turned down being Tony Snow’s date.

Attendants: 14 women known as members of the “house party,” not bridesmaids

And by “House Party” they mean “These sorority girls have thrown some massive house parties in their day.”

Bride’s gown designer: Oscar de la Renta

Slimming undergarments paid for by the SPANX PAC.

Ring: The diamond, a Hager family heirloom, reset in a ring that also features sapphires

Nothing says “I’m the worst President in history’s daughter” like a blood diamond.

Maid of Honor: Jenna’s twin sister, Barbara

That’s the pretty one.

Ceremony site: At a cross made of beige Texas limestone erected near a lake on the ranch

I hope you enjoyed the global warming while you were there, Mr. President.

Engagement: August 15, 2007, at Acadia National Park in Maine

I give it three years.

0 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized